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I Scream, You Scream, We All Scream for… BEER!

I wouldn’t say I’m a beer snob, but if you stick a can of Coors Light in front of me, I’m not going to lie — I’ll ask you to bring me a glass of water instead because it tastes the same and has far fewer calories.

Unless it’s a hot summer day and I’m craving a cold light beer to get me through a project or a giant, juicy hamburger, I’m usually going to pick a darker, heavier beer.

So when Justin said he wanted to tour the Coors Brewery while we were in Colorado, I was intrigued because I hadn’t been since before I was of legal drinking age, but also secretly wishing we could have gone to some other brewery.

Turns out, though, that this one was worth the trip.

We arrived at the complex in Golden, Colorado, parked, and waited in line for about 20 minutes before getting on a tour bus.  The folks at Coors run a smooth — and free — operation.  My only complaint is that the outdoor waiting area wasn’t covered, hence my first high-altitude sunburn of the trip.  Our tour guide was hilarious, taking us on a quick run through downtown Golden before dropping us off outside of the brewery.

Coors Brewery

Hey, red shirt guy.  Get out of my shot.

Since the last time I was there, they turned the brewery part into a self-guided tour.  The nice thing was that we could meander as we pleased, listening to our little self-guided tour speakers.  Coors also had stations set up throughout the walk where employees could answer any questions we might have.

Of course, I don’t remember anything I heard through the speaker, so let’s just look at the pictures, shall we?

I have no idea who this woman is.  But she wouldn’t move, so I took the picture anyway.  She happens to be pointing to the label of what I’ve since discovered is a very awesome beer.

copper kettles

 The infamous copper kettles.  All I remember is that there were a lot of them, and you could determine the various purposes of each by looking at the size of the shaft.  (Ha!)  Also, the big red signs.

We’ll call this Mission Control.  I’m pretty sure that guy was watching football.  Or porn.  Or both.

Hmm… how does one test the quality of beer?

By drinking it, I imagine.

About halfway through the tour we came upon the Fresh Beer Room, where we were able to sample exceedingly fresh Coors or Coors Light, straight from the source.

I’ll admit it was tasty, fresh as it was, but it was still just Coors.

One of the coolest parts was the packaging room.  The maze of conveyor belts, gears, and complicated looking machinery had us mesmerized for several minutes.  Waaaay up high in the back, we could see cans coming in.  Then stuff would happen and suddenly they’d be in boxes.

Crazy.

By this point we were getting antsy and ready for the final stop of the tour — the bar.

The coolest part about the entire experience, aside from seeing that it’s actual people — not elves — who are responsible for putting beer in my fridge, was the fact that everything was free.  Including 3 pints each of our choice at the end of the tour.

The Colorado Native was good, but the Batch 19 was phenomenal.

Couple of Batch 19s.

I asked the bartender how they manage to keep the locals from stopping in every day for some free beers, and he said that they don’t!  Guests are limited to one visit per day, and he said there are students from the Colorado School of Mines who show up daily.

Daily.

Dude.  I totally went to the wrong college.