Therapy For The Domestiphobe And Other Ways To Cope.
Truth: When it comes to home renovation (or decorating or craft or basically anything) projects, I’m a wee bit of a massively overbearing perfectionist.
Which is why, when we’re working on a project and things go terribly wrong, I sometimes find it necessary to take a breath and step away, before Justin takes a breath and steps away permanently.
Not that he’d do that just because I tell him he’s doing it wrong eight hundred and forty-seven times.
I don’t think.
But here’s the thing: Today, when the floor guy called to say his installer wasn’t going to show up because he was sick, and we’re already a day late because my drywaller took over a week-and-half longer than promised to finish his job, and really, his job isn’t even finished because it’s horrific and completely wrong in some spots but I paid him and told him to go home because I didn’t feel like having his face in my house for even another minute, and now everything in our home is covered in drywall dust and we still need to sand and mud some places and my kitchen currently looks like a cross between Dexter’s kill room and a 1976 cocaine party in a Vegas hotel room —
— I realized that sometimes things get so bad — so immensely frustrating — so incredibly wrong — that the entire situation is completely, utterly, HILARIOUS.
It has to be.
There is suffering in the world. Real suffering. And my biggest complaint is that my soffit’s too deep. And the new drywall already has cracks. And we broke the filler that goes between the two cabinets. And I don’t have drawer fronts for my IKEA cabinet. And I only have half a floor. And my cabinets are veneer, which will probably be incredibly difficult to paint. And my refrigerator is in my sunroom.
But so what?
At least I have recessed lights. And they work, guys.
Also, I called the folks at Rev-A-Shelf this morning because we had a slight malfunction with the pull-out spice rack filler last night when Justin used screws that were too long and couldn’t figure out why he was having such a hard time screwing them into the wood when really he was screwing them into the steel glider.
Me: You seriously didn’t realize that you were getting so frustrated because you were actually bending steel?
Justin: You’re seriously not impressed that I can bend steel?
So I’m trying not to give him too much of a hard time because a) he can bend steel, 2) I’ve made approximately five hundred and fifty-two mistakes in this kitchen, and d) the nicest customer service person ever at Rev-A-Shelf is sending us a replacement glide for just the cost of shipping. Which is pretty much amazing, considering I was up-front about the fact that I’d bought it from Amazon at nearly half the price of the listing on the Rev-A-Shelf website. (And no, they have no idea I have a blog.)
So, like, at least someone is trying to help us finish this thing.
And even though it’s not actually functional and so totally wrong, I can’t help but feel that it’s more right than this:
Even though it looks like this:
Because even with the plastic, you can see how much brighter it is.
Which kind of makes it okay that everything I touch is coated with a fine white powder and yesterday I found myself vacuuming my vacuum at 3:30 in the afternoon.
Plus, when you’re renovating, and especially when you realize you’ve hired a crappy contractor, you’re allowed to day-drink guilt-free.
(Don’t worry, mom. I wouldn’t even know where to find the Baileys. Or my cup, for that matter.)
P.S. This post is really more of a way to process my feelings than an actual cry for help. But if you want to send me presents, or the phone number to a good therapist, I’d totally be okay with that.
Comments
I know you’re going through hell with the reno, but I must say that your house is going to look AMAZING when you’re finished!!!!!!!
Aww, thanks Andi!! I’m glad you have faith — because I’m seriously starting to lose hope that this will ever look like anything more than a powdery box with some 80’s-style cabinets, half a floor, and a missing countertop. :)
Oh…. that space…. it is going to look so wondeful and airy and inspiring when you are done. I was going to say AMAZING in caps but Andi already did that. Seriously, I can see the potential… it will all be worth it in the end. I also fully support therapeutic day drinking.
Thank you!! I’m glad you guys still have the vision. Now, of course, there’s all this pressure to deliver, but we’ll cross that bridge when we come to it. ;)
You’ll get there, and then this will all be but a happy memory. :) While I realize it’s not even close in scope, I’ve finally decided to repaint the brown bedroom that I have hated since the second the paint went on. Have been talking about it forever, but realized I needed to take some irreversible action if it was ever going to happen. Painted swatches on yesterday. The look of horror on my husband’s face when he got home: “But you did it in such obvious places! Now there’s no going back.” Yes, that’s the point. Pretty stressed about picking a colour now though. After hating this colour for almost two years, really want to get it right.
Happy memory or horrific nightmare — funny how nostalgia can make even something like this seem fun down the line. And painting a room is a big deal! Especially if you’re painting it yourselves — it’s a bigger undertaking than many people think, and it’s the worst when you get done with it, let it dry, take a step back, and realize you don’t like the color. All. That. Work. I hope you get one you love this time! (It’s even hard with swatches because the colors you picked are going to look different next to the brown than they will when they fill the whole room. Hue is such a fascinating and frustrating thing!)
Worry? I was just thinking maybe I should get to the liquor store to pick up some Bailey’s!
HA!
Another blogger once wrote about the dreaded middle of a project- when you are too committed to back out, but the end result is seemingly eons away. I very much appreciated their perspective (and right now we can’t even find a flooring or drywall contractor to solve our woes). http://www.younghouselove.com/2012/11/the-middle-makes-no-sense/
Haha, that was SO fitting! I’ve been checking out their blog on and off for years, and I have to say though — they do seem to work way faster than we do. That would make the middle much easier to stomach. :)
I dunno, Katie. That floral wallpaper was pretty great. I assume you’ll be putting up more floral wallpaper, once you’re done with all the dry walling, yes? :)
It was great, but the colors were all wrong. The next floral paper will consist mainly of Pantone’s Color of the Year for 2014, Radiant Orchid, of course! (Although, the way this project is going, I might have to pick something in 2015’s color instead.) ;)