One of These Things is Not Like the Others…
Throughout my life, I’ve always felt… a little out-of-place.
A lot out-of-place.
From the time a boy named Jason puked on me after the mile run in 6th grade (I still don’t feel clean), to my bespectacled, brace-faced, promless high school career, to my time spent trying to understand and accept life as a Yankee living in various parts of the South (um, boiled peanuts? really?), feeling out-of-place has actually become my way in the world. The only way I feel in place.
Make sense?
In fact, I’m not really sure what would happen if one day I woke up and found myself where I’m supposed to be. Where I feel comfortable.
Probably the last of the loose screws would detach itself from my mind and fall out of my ear and, as I watch it roll-bounce down the pavement toward the vanishing point of existence, the nice young men in their clean white coats would come and take me away to a place where I would never feel comfortable again.
Probably.
But that’s just speculation.
This whole out-of-placeness was only further confirmed in a recent memo from my editor at Re-Nest. It read (and I paraphrase):
I’m so pleased to welcome five new members [to the team]: Laurie (New York), Alexa (San Francisco), Liana (New York), Julia (Chicago), and Katie (Sanford, North Carolina).
Okay. Aside from the fact that they all have movie star names while mine is so girl-next-door, notice anything… odd? I don’t know… something that makes it all too painfully clear that I’m ridiculously out of my element?
I’ll give you a hint.
Maybe — maybe — it’s the fact that I’m the only person whose city needed to be followed by the state name for clarification.
Maybe.
Maybe because Sanford is not really a city, but more like a town with a Waffle House and a Cracker Barrel.
Maybe.
But you know what?
Since feeling out of place makes me feel in place, I’m going to take this as a positive sign. If I can’t go to the Big City to get a job, I’ll make the Big City job come to me.
I think this could work.
Comments
I’m glad I’m not the only one who always feels out of place. I’ve never quite felt like I’ve belonged where I should be and I’m not sure where that is or if I’ll ever find it.
Maybe if we were too comfortable we’d have nothing to write about. I have to think it’s supposed to be like this — it’s comforting somehow. :)
Whenever I feel like I don’t belong I just think of Groucho Marx’s line ” I don’t care to belong to any club that will have me as a member” A little self-deprecation and judgment of others is always a good thing ; )
HA! I love that. And in my case, it’s probably true. ;)
And now that song will be in my head all morning. Thanks.
Seeing where they all live, makes it even cooler that you were picked. They probably all already work at or intern at magazines or publishing houses. You were picked because your writing kicks @ss. Congrats again!
And you know, I totally thought of an awesome title for this post right after I hit “publish,” so then it was too late. Of course, now I can’t remember it for the life of me. Ah well.
And they actually want me for my pictures — not my writing really — but potato patato. I’m feeling pretty good. Thanks for all of your support. :)
Haha, I know what you mean! Sometimes I feel out of place in the blogging world because my topics are kind of disorganized at times. I can’t wait to hear how your writing gig works out. Good luck to you!
Thanks, Kristi!! :)