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My Special Talent. (It’s Not Making Poached Egg.)

I can’t remember whether I’ve ever told you, but I have a very special talent.


(I also have a horrific memory, which would be super detrimental to my career as a virtual assistant if I didn’t write everything — and I mean everything — down for future reference.)


My talent, though, is that I have the rare knack for actually getting worse at certain things the more times I do them.

[This is where I’d insert a photo of me boiling this egg for 10 seconds — if I’d had the kind of memory that would’ve reminded me to take a photo of that.]

For example, the first time I made a poached egg a couple of years ago, it turned out beautifully.


And of course I was all, Why do people think this is so hard? Poached eggs are like… the easiest thing in the world to make.

[This is where I’d insert a picture of me adding a splash of white or cider vinegar — if I had the kind of memory that reminded me to actually add a splash of white or cider vinegar.]

The second time I attempted to make a poached egg, it was pretty much a disaster.


It was like karma decided to teach my ego a lesson, and I ended up with a pot of cooked egg white strands and a random floating lump of yolk.


(Aside from the yolk, it kind of looked like Professor Snape’s memory pensieve, for all you Potter fans in the bleachers.)


What I’m showing you today is probably Attempt #14 or so, and you can see things haven’t improved much — even with the respected Julia technique.

But no matter.

Even ugly poached eggs taste excellent when served up with the right kind of ingredients.


And I just happened to have some bread on-hand.


And a single avocado in its death throes before full-on rottage.


And a few meager morsels of smoked salmon left over from this decadent dish.


Over all of which I placed my homely, slightly overcooked poached egg.


And a sprinkle of freshly ground pepper for good measure.


And, you know, it mostly worked out during the Moment of Truth.


Kind of.


Despite the fact I had to dig a little.


It tasted like a deliciously rich, fatty, omega 3-filled lunch that would undoubtedly make my skin look amazing.


And it’s a good thing I enjoyed it.


Because it’s very unlikely I’ll ever be able to make it this well again.

Smoked Salmon Avocado Toast with Poached Egg


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Mona Hines

My mouth is watering! Looks delicious!


It was very yummy! I might have to start keeping this stuff on hand. :)

Celery and the City

If I were the kind of person who could eat a runny egg without wanting to throw up for days, I would definitely make this, as it does look delish – sans the yellow stuff running down the side. So luckily, I don’t have to subject myself to such years of torture, because I can tell myself that I am just fabulous at egg-poaching ;)


Hahaha sorry, I should’ve put a PSA at the top of the post to avoid scrolling if you’re not seriously into runny yolks. It’s a shame, though — you’re missing out on LIQUID GOLD.


Looks beautiful! But I admit I am not much of a runny yolk gal either….still…I would eat your masterpiece for sure!


Aw, that means the world to me, Diana! I’ll make you a believer in the runny yolk. :)


Well, practice! Because I want that for breakfast when we come to visit in 2 weeks!


Haha this is a pricy one I can’t afford to practice. We’ll just have to have the stuff on-hand and wing it! Even if it’s ugly, it’s still tasty. :)


Looks like a fantastic method if you want to make more than one at a time! Though I have a very hard time believing her claim that it’s how the pros do it. She doesn’t provide a clear photo, but in the one she has, you can see all of the “wrinkles” from the plastic wrap, and I’ve never been served a poached egg that looks like that. ;) But I totally might have to use this if I want to make multiple poached eggs for company. Thanks!!


They do have the wrinkles, but they’re kind of pretty. Like flowers. And no, I’ve never seen them look this way in a restaurant either.

Mary R

I also feel like I get worse at things in life at times too… volleyball, making bread, etc. The egg may not look that pretty to you… but the whole thing looks delish to me


Why thank you! I made it again yesterday and the egg definitely turned out even uglier — but still tasted delicious! :)


If I was single and you were single and we were both lesbian, I would marry you just for this dish!


This is very likely the funniest comment I’ve ever gotten. #flattered


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